When Everything Falls Apart: A Journey Back to Truth
Ever had a day where it felt like everything was crumbling?
Where fear, doubt, and scarcity took over so completely that the Truth seemed unreachable?
I had one of those days recently. A day when the mind—the endless loop of old stories, patterns, and fears—became so loud, I couldn’t hear anything else. It was as if all the healing, all the practices, all the growth I’ve experienced vanished in an instant.
But here’s what I learned: Falling apart doesn’t erase the Truth. It’s part of the unfolding.
The Trigger
It all started with a meeting.
I met with a business group that specializes in helping Consciousness entrepreneurs build aligned, thriving businesses. They were professional, kind, and thoughtful. They presented a clear, structured plan to help me take my work to the next level.
But there was a catch.
The program required two things: money I didn’t currently have and a level of technical expertise that has always felt like my Achilles’ heel. And suddenly, the stories started running on repeat in my head.
“You can’t do this.”
“You’re not smart enough.”
“You’ll fail like you have in the past.”
The mind was relentless, dredging up every past pattern, every failure, every ounce of self-doubt. As someone with a Vata-dominant constitution in Ayurveda, I’m naturally prone to overwhelm and anxiety—and that day, my Vata was through the roof. I felt ungrounded, untethered, and completely disconnected from the Truth of who I really am.
The Spiral
The fear wasn’t just about the program. It was about what it brought up in me:
• The belief that I can’t make it
• The doubt that I’m capable of creating the life I’ve envisioned
• The fear that all of this—my podcast, my website, my programs—are going to fall flat
And then came the shame.
How could I, someone who has done so much inner work, still fall into this trap?
How could I let the noise of the mind drown out everything I know to be true?
If you’ve ever felt like this—if you’ve ever doubted yourself so deeply that you wanted to quit everything—I want you to know: you’re not alone.
The Turning Point: Coming Back to Myself
The shift didn’t come all at once. It came in small, quiet moments of self-care and connection.
1️⃣ Grounding Through Ayurveda
First, I recognized that my Vata energy needed balancing. I heated up some leftover kimchi soup—a warm, heavy meal full of grounding flavors. Ayurveda teaches that food is medicine, and that meal was exactly what I needed to calm my nervous system.
✅ Ayurvedic tip for stress relief: If you’re feeling anxious, eat warm, cooked foods—avoid raw, dry, or cold foods that aggravate Vata energy.
2️⃣ Movement & Connection
Then, a friend called and asked if I wanted to go for a walk.
Everything in me wanted to say “no”. I was still deep in the spiral, feeling unworthy and stuck. But I said “yes”.
And, as we walked three miles together, just enjoying the fresh air and each other’s company, I felt the chemistry in my body begin to shift. The movement, the connection, and the grounding energy of the earth helped me come back into my body.
3️⃣ Kundalini Practices for Emotional Balance
Finally, I turned to my practices:
✅ Kundalini breathwork to settle my nervous system
✅ Deep belly breathing to activate my parasympathetic response
✅ Mantra meditation to quiet the mind
The mantra that carried me through:
✨ “I’m not my thoughts. I’m not my feelings. I’m the Truth that remains.”
These practices didn’t make the fear disappear, but they created space. Space to remember who I am. Space to reconnect with the Truth that was always there, waiting for me.
The Lesson: Falling Apart is Part of the Process
Here’s what I learned:
✨ Falling apart isn’t failure. It’s part of being human.
If I hadn’t had this experience, I wouldn’t have seen so clearly the ways that fear and scarcity still linger within me. And now that I’ve been reminded of them, I can continue to work with them. I can love them. I can release them.
I also realized that it’s okay to say “no.”
Just because something looks like the right opportunity doesn’t mean it’s the right one for me right now.
Everything unfolds perfectly, even when it feels like chaos.
Especially when it feels like chaos.
Because those moments of chaos? They’re often the ones that bring us back to the Truth.
Moving Forward: How to Reground Yourself
If you’ve ever had a day where it felt like everything was falling apart, here’s what I want you to remember:
🌿 Ground yourself with nourishing food (warm, heavy, and cooked)
🌿 Move your body (walk, stretch, dance—just get the energy moving)
🌿 Breathe deeply (long, slow breaths signal safety to your nervous system)
🌿 Repeat a mantra (something that reminds you of your Truth)
🌿 Trust the process (even when you don’t understand it)
Your mind will always try to tell you stories. But you don’t have to believe them.
Your Turn:
I’d love to hear from you. Have you ever had a moment like this - where everything felt like it was fall apart, and the mind convinced you that all was lost?
⚪️ How did you navigate it?
⚪️ What helped you find your way back to center?
⚪️ Did the experience reveal something deeper about your patterns, fears, or growth?
If you’re in the middle of one of those moments right now, what’s one small thing you can do today to care for yourself?
Share your reflections in the comments or reach out - I’d love to hear your story. Let’s keep this conversation going.
Final Thoughts
Falling apart isn’t the end of the story - it’s part of the unfolding. It’s not a sign of failure, but an invitation to return to Truth.
If you’re in the thick of it, know this: you’re not alone, and you’re not lost. The Truth of who you are is still there, underneath the noise, waiting for you to remember.
Keep going. Keep trusting. Keep showing up for yourself.
And when the chaos rises again (because it always will), you’ll know exactly how to meet it - not with resistance, but with presence.
Because every moment, even the messy ones, are bringing you home to yourself.
✨ You’re already enough, just as you are.✨